Movie: Wall-E

Yesterday after church there was a showing of “Wall-E” at the theater that started within 30 minutes, so we opted to buy tickets and take the kids to see it since they really wanted to. Considering the fact that the movie had NO human dialogue until at least halfway through, the kids did well and seemed to enjoy it, although they peppered us with questions for the entire first half because of that aforementioned “silent movie” quality.

That aside, Wall-E was a cute movie. However.

And this is a BIG however.

I don’t care HOW much the director of the movie (Andrew Stanton) swears he had the idea of this movie long before the environmentalist crackpots came out of the woodwork and said the planet was doomed in a few short decades if we didn’t shape up our acts. Of course, he didn’t say “environmentalist crackpots” – he probably said something like “people I agree with” because was this movie EVER a plug for people to move off-the-grid, grow their own veggies, never use plastic and forget about hair products, then I don’t know what is.

The tree-huggers are gonna LOVE this movie and I could almost hear Al Gore…well, my mom reads the blog so I can’t say what I REALLY hear happening to Al Gore when he sees this movie, so let’s just say I can hear him squealing like a schoolgirl crushing on The Jonas Brothers (or NKOTB or Peter Frampton – pick your decade). I laughed when a local newspaper reviewer said “Wall-E” should be called “An Inconvenient Cartoon.” Heh. VERY funny. Because it’s TRUE!!

And I love how the movie implies that in the future all of the Earth citizens will be lazy slobs who never walk ANYWHERE or interact with ANYONE. As if EVERYONE (including the health nuts) on the Earth will suddenly forget about exercise or walking or movement. Yeah, sure.

Okay, okay, I know I need to suspend my belief because it’s a movie and a cartoon and merely fiction and yadda yadda yadda. But excuse me for getting a bit pissed off for taking my kids to what should be a cute little movie about a robot looking for love and getting environmentalist whackjob propaganda shoved down our collective throats.

Ahem. Moving on. Wall-E was cute, and his romantic squeeze EVE was sweet. I loved Mo, the anal-retentive cleaning bot. I would rate the movie much higher if it didn’t have all the “earthlings suck” stuff going on. If YOU are able to look past all that, you’ll probably enjoy the movie. If you think it’ll piss you off as much as it did me, then may I suggest waiting to rent it using a free RedBox code in a few months?

Needless to say we won’t be buying this one. Even if the kids beg. Which is a shame because I did cry when Wall-E had his motherboard replaced (I’m not HEARTLESS, people – just not in the mood to deal with environmentalist it’s-the-end-of-the-world whackjobs).

3 attempts to hold hands out of five.