Hamilton once said, “What is a legacy? It’s planting seeds in a garden you never get to see.”
Er…that wasn’t Hamilton. That was Lin-Manuel Miranda AS Hamilton. Or did Hamilton actually say it? I suppose I could go do some half-assed internet research and get the answer, but suffice to say, somehow in some way someone somewhere loosely related or directly related to Hamilton said it.
Moving on.
Many years ago when my parents were getting ready to retire and downsize their house, my sister and I went through the house with my mom and picked out “what we were gonna get.” I used quotes because a lot of people don’t like to talk about death, but let’s be frank – death happens, and it’s better if everyone knows what they’re getting so there’s no arguments later on. It was very methodical and basically had my mother point to an item, one of us would claim it, and my mom jotted the information down for future reference. I don’t know if the big master list still exists, but through the years post-retirement as my parents have continued to declutter their retirement house (and by “declutter” I don’t mean their house is cluttered – quite the contrary. My mother’s house is always immaculate and ready for unexpected company to drop in and stay for a week or two), my mother has called or emailed to say, “Hey, I’m ready to get rid of _____, and you had claimed it – do you still want it? If not, I’ll offer it to your sister and if she doesn’t want it I’ll sell or donate it.”
Most of the time I say I don’t want what she’s offering anymore, although I did score my parent’s ginormous coffee table late last year which I LOVE LOVE LOVE (it used to be a table in a library but the legs were chopped short to make it into a coffee table – it has names carved into it and everything and I love it). ETA: Not sure why he didn’t just leave a comment, but my dad texted me last night to tell me the table was not cut down, but was a library table used in a preschool – that’s why it is short.
My kids have never expressed an interest in anything in our house. CootieGirl’s bedroom furniture that we bought specifically because it looks timeless? She hates it (granted, it’s over ten years old, but still – all it needs to be updated is new drawer pulls (and I’ve told her if she wants to paint the furniture she can do any color she wants)). The piano? Neither wants it. They have scorned everything I’ve ever said will be theirs one day.
But a few weeks ago, as CG and I were looking for a movie to watch in our DVD collection, she asked, “When you die, can I have your movie collection?”
I laughed. “When I die there won’t be such things as DVDs anymore, but sure, whatever type of collection I have when I die can be yours.”
Then a couple nights ago I mentioned to Denis that I had pre-ordered the latest Fiestaware color, shipping on June 1. It’s called Meadow and is yet another green color (see featured image above). I yearn for the day they finally figure out how to do hot pink or hot purple as a color. Anyway, CootieBoy overheard me talking about it and said, “Mama, when I move out can I have some of your Fiesta?”
“You want my dishes?” I asked, surprised.
“Just the plates and bowls I use.”
“How about this – when you move out for good, I’ll buy six place settings for you to get you started. You can pick whatever colors you want.”
He was very happy about that. Imagine how much happier he’ll be when I die and he gets ALL the Fiesta, including the vintage stuff packed and stored away?
Who’d have thought out of all the things in our house, it would be those two things they’d want? But in a way, it’s a lovely little physical and emotional legacy (of sorts) of familial bonding I have with my kids. My daughter and I spend many hours together each week watching movies (last night we watched Alfred Hitchcock’s “Rear Window”) – it’s something that we enjoy and I love that I get to spend so much time with my daughter as a result. So it makes me happy that she wants that little bit of me when I’m gone; a way to stay connected to me (“I remember when my mom and I made popcorn on the stove and watched __________ together.”). And my son loves making his ice cream sundaes in a Fiestaware bowl and I envision him using Fiestaware as an adult and having fond memories of his childhood, and sharing them with whomever he is sharing his life, just as I share my life with him now.
