Can I Call Them Both “Brace Face” Now?

My kids both got braces yesterday. Yep – both of them, at the same time. Literally – they sat in chairs right next to each other and both had them applied at the same time. The only difference is hers are completely paid-in-full already, but his will be on a payment plan for the next 12-15 months. She should get hers off just in time for senior formal pictures to get taken in late 2020, and he’ll get his off as he heads into his senior year in mid-2021.

I know they are old for braces (16 and almost 15) – most kids get them in middle school (some even earlier), but last year when I took them in to get quotes, we found out that Denis’s insurance at his new job required he be on the dental plan for a year before they’d contribute to braces. In the end I locked in the quoted rate I received until we past the 12-month mark, at which point I made the appointment for the kids to get metal-mouthed-up.

During that 12-month waiting period, CootieGirl had her wisdom teeth removed, I had some dental issues, and I went from being able to pay for both sets of braces in full from my HSA to only being able to pay for one of them outright. But that’s okay – I still put a hefty downpayment down on CootieBoy’s braces, and they should be paid off in no time at all since I plan on paying more than the monthly payments the receptionist quoted me.

The appointment went smoothly, with no complications. When it came time to select rubber band colors (they have COLORS now!) he chose blue and she chose orange. I was surprised because he wears orange EVERY DAY (he really needs to go to Clemson someday), so I’d have thought he’d want orange bands. And she NEVER wears orange.

The list of restricted foods they reviewed with us caused CG to go into a mild depression – all her favorite snack foods are now off limits. Within an hour of getting home she called me to ask if she could have a bagel. “Uh…yes, but you need to eat really small bites. Like, bites you’d feed your cat. Pick off pieces and put them in your mouth. Do not gnaw at the bagel.”

“Can I at least use BUTTER?”

“Sure.”

In the meantime, when we parted ways after the appointment (CG drove them both home while I went into work) CB claimed he was not going to eat until I got home from work, lest he pop a bracket by eating something he shouldn’t. Dinner ended up being soup, mashed potatoes and applesauce. He’s convinced he won’t be able to chew solid food properly for 2 years and claimed he’d just use a blender every day to mix his food together into a disgusting milkshake.

It’s gonna be a fun summer.