Talk Radio

When I had my truck I hardly ever listened to the radio. I had a CD player and was able to listen to all of my favorite CDs and never concerned myself with what was playing on the radio.

Last summer my truck died and I had to get a cheap new car. I bought a Hyundai Elantra with a tape deck. No CD. I dug out a bunch of old tapes (I’ve got hundreds that I need to get rid of but just can’t let go). Quickly those tapes got boring and I was left with the radio.

In the mornings I had Scott & Todd, two men I found highly annoying but mildly amusing at times. And of course there was Howard Stern, who was awesome in the last half of 2005 because he spent so much time playing classic moments from the show. I stopped listening to Stern a couple years ago because he started having strippers on just about every day and it got old. But once I discovered he was playing classic bits like Cookiepuss episode with Fred, I began listening every morning.

On the commute home I found that I really liked listening to the last hour of the Booker show, also on KROCK. They had a nice mix of people and always seemed to just really enjoy doing the show. Nick’s sports report was always something to look forward to as well. The alternative to Booker was the Rocky Allen show. Apparently he was on the air, then went off, and recently came back because when I first discovered this show a lot of callers kept welcoming Rocky back. I don’t know the scoop, but in my head I envision down-and-out heroin addiction, kicking it back on Skid Row while his hopes of syndication go down the drain. His sidekick, Blaine, is occasionally funny, but not overwhelmingly so.

But now it’s 2006. Stern has gone the way of satellite radio, only to be replaced by David Lee Roth. Roth is surprisingly intelligent – he uses words that I didn’t think he’d even know and talks about anything from gun control to the latest Rolling Stones album. But you can tell he’s new at radio and I can only take him in small doses. And Booker – well, he got the shaft and his show moved to the 7 p.m. – 11 p.m. hours. In his stead is the Radio Chick, who apparently was on satellite and made the move to “free” radio. Her sidekicks are extremely annoying but if she has an interesting topic on I’ll usually listen for as long as I can.

For a long time I loved Jack FM – the station that plays the widest variety of music known to man. But they play Def Leppard about once an hour, which gets old. And I swear the Christian music station only plays 20 different songs at a time.

But really – radio sucks. Just sucks.